Britney Spears pleaded with the judge for the first time in two years to bring an end to her court-ordered conservatorship that has been in place for nearly 13 years. More than 100 of her supporters were outside of the courtroom supporting the #FreeBritney movement. Her written speech lasted more than 20 minutes and the singer refused to back down. When an attorney representing her co-conservator tried to close the court, Spears shouted that she wanted it public. “They’ve interfered with my life so I feel like it should be an open court hearing and they should listen and hear what I have to say,” the icon said. She went on to detail heartbreaking allegations like she was told she can’t get married and has an IUD they refuse to let her take out because they don’t want her to have any more children.

I’ve been in denial; I’ve been in shock; I am traumatized [Britney]

©GettyImages

“The last time I spoke to you, it made me feel like I was dead like I didn‘t matter. like you thought I was lying. I’m not lying, so that maybe you understand the depth and degree, I deserve changes,” she told the judge, per CNN. She went on to explain she wants to start a family with her boyfriend Sam Asghari but doesn’t have the agency to do so because she has an IUD that her team refuses to let her take out. “I want to be able to get married and have a baby. I was told I can’t get married. I have an IUD inside me but this so-called team won’t let me go to the doctor to remove it because they don’t want me to have any more children. This conservatorship is doing me way more harm than good.” She told the courts, “I truly believe this conservatorship is abusive… I want to end the conservatorship.”

“All I want is to own my money and for this to end and for my boyfriend to be able to drive me in his (expletive) car,” Spears said, adding she wants to be able to sue her family. The heartbreak details continued and Spears said she was forced to take lithium against her will because she didn’t like the choreography for her planned Vegas residency in 2019, which was canceled. “I’m not here to be anyone’s slave,” she said. “I can say no to a dance move.” She detailed the effects the drug had on her, “It’s a strong drug. You can go mentally impaired if you stay on it longer than 5 months. I felt drunk, I couldn‘t even have a conversation with my mom or dad about anything. They had me with six different nurses.“

“I’d like to be able to share my story with the world,” she said. ”I want to be able to be heard. By making me keep this in for so long, it’s not good for my heart. It concerns me I’m not allowed to be able to be heard. I have the right to use my voice. My attorney says I can’t let the public know what they did to me.” Spears ended her remarks by saying, “I deserve to have a two to three-year break. I feel open, and I‘m OK to talk to you about this. I feel ganged up on, bullied, left out, and alone. I’m tired of feeling alone. I deserve to have the same rights, having a child or any of those things.”

Vivian Thoreen, attorney for Spears’ father James Spears, gave a brief statement that said, “He is sorry to see his daughter suffering and in so much pain. Mr. Spears loves his daughter, and misses her very much.”

According to Deadline Spears attorney Samuel Ingham III told the court now that the singer had her say, she would like “proceedings sealed going forward.” How those proceedings move ahead is TBD as no formal petition for termination of the conservatorship has actually be filed. During her speech spears said she didn’t know she could petition to end the conservatorship. “I’m sorry for my ignorance,” she said, “but I didn’t know that.” She explained, “It’s embarrassing and demoralizing what I’ve been through, and that’s the main reason I didn’t say it openly. I didn’t think anybody would believe me.”