For the first time since coming out at transgender, Elliot Page is sharing his story in his first interview since coming out as transgender.

In his new cover story with TIME Magazine, Page opened up about his journey, which includes the pivotal moment when he got his hair cut short at the age of 9.

“I felt like a boy,” Page told the publication. “I wanted to be a boy. I would ask my mom if I could be someday.”

However, just a few months later, he landed his first role on Pit Pony and had to grow his hair.

“I became a professional actor at the age of 10,” he explained, “Of course I had to look a certain way.”

As the years went by, Page’s career continued to skyrocket, starring in other movies like Hard Candy and Juno, even earning an Oscar nomination. Still, with all of that success, dressing up for red carpet events that go hand-in-hand with actingonly left him feeling further and further away from his truth.

“I just never recognized myself,” Page said. “For a long time, I could not even look at a photo of myself.”

Later on in his career, he started acting in blockbuster films like Inception and X-Men Days of Future Past, which is also when he began battling depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. Page said that he didn’t know “how to explain to people that even though [I was] an actor, just putting on a T-shirt cut for a woman would make me so unwell.”

Finally, in December 2020, Elliot felt ready to share his truth, coming out as transgender in an Instagram post that garnered 3.5 million likes. In the note, he announced his pronouns are he/they and shared his name is Elliot.

“I was finally able to embrace being transgender,” he told the publication, “and letting myself fully become who I am.”

When he shared that major piece of himself with the world, he revealed to TIME that he was also in Toronto recovering from top surgery. Page noted being transgender isn’t all about surgery, but said it allowed him to finally see himself in the mirror and feel comfortable with himself, saying, “It has completely transformed my life.”

Now that he’s come out, Page is on a mission to help other people in the transgender community.

“My privilege has allowed me to have resources to get through and to be where I am today,” he said. “And of course I want to use that privilege and platform to help in the ways I can.”