Martha Stewart roasts Justin Bieber: 'You wouldn't last a week in prison'

It seems as if Martha Stewart is as fearless onstage as she is in the kitchen. The beloved lifestyle guru wasn't afraid to take a few shots at singer Justin Bieber, 21, at his Comedy Central Roast, which aired on Monday. Surrounded by comedic talents like Kevin Hart, Chris D'Elia and Natasha Legerre and celebrities like Snoop Dogg, Martha held her own when it came to joking at Justin's expense.

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Martha, 73, who seemingly doesn't mind referencing less complimentary moments in her history, even gave Justin some much-needed advice. And it wasn't on how to make a casserole or fold a napkin.

"Let's get to the reason I'm here tonight, which is to give Justin Bieber some tips to use when he inevitably ends up in prison," she boldly said. "I've been in lockup and you wouldn't last a week, so pay attention. The first thing you'll need is a shank. I made mine out of a pin tail comb and a pack of gum. It's so simple. I found Bubbalicious works best and it's so much fun to say."

Martha went on to say how she survived her time away by finding a tough fellow inmate and sticking by her side, after which "prison was easier than making blueberry scones." She then topped off that zinger with, "Shaq, I hope your mom doesn't still hold a grudge."

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Justin, who has dated big stars such as Selena Gomez, was also the recipient of some love advice. Martha explained that she thinks the pop star needs to settle down, find some balance and look for the right girl.

"She'll have to be someone on your level, someone powerful and famous and rich, someone you can smoke a joint with or indulge in the occasional three-way," she joked. "I'm talking about a playa in the board room and a freak in the bedroom."

Where could Justin find such a woman? Martha ended with: "So Justin, my final piece of advice is, call me."

Photo: Getty Images

Watch Martha dig into Justin Bieber in the video clip below:

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